goddess of clarity: a blog about politics, culture, and serenity

Archive: January 1 - January 15, 2008

January 14, 2008 — 12:29 EST

Ordinarily I'd be leading this morning with one of my witty and thorough "The Goddess Watches the [FILL IN THE BLANK] So You Don't Have To" reports on last night's Golden Globe Awards. Sadly, thanks to the ongoing writer's strike, this year's Golden Globes were confined to a half-hour news conference (hosted by that odious little man, Billy Bush) that was up against both The Amazing Race and the premiere of The Sarah Conner Chronicles.

The Goddess is not one to cross a picket line. So in solidarity with the writing brotherhood and sisterhood, I shall remain silent on the topic of who wore what (since nobody wore anything) and will simply join in a simple prayer that the Oscars will not suffer a similar fate. A girl's gotta have an awards show or two to sustain herself through these bleak winter months!

—lori.

January 9, 2008 — 22:00 EST :

Even politics must brake for fashion. Let's get ready to Runway!

The Goddess Watches Project Runway
(so you don't have to)

10:02 -- "This challenge is all about creating memories," says Heidi. Immediately the designers are concerned that they will be asked to make wedding dresses. But it's much worse that that, and much more hilarious. A gaggle of girls from St. Jon Bon Jovi High School in New Jersey troop out onto the runway. Yep, this week it's prom dresses!

How awesome is this! I'm surprised they haven't come up with this idea for a challenge before now. It's one of those brilliant ideas that is so obvious except for the fact that no one has thought of it before.

I remember my senior prom. I had this totally dramatic hissy fit about wanting to stay out all night with my friends, and I wore this completely ridiculous Stevie Nicks-style dress with a pink sash that I dyed red. I accessorized with black John Lennon sunglasses and red tights. My mom took me prom dress shopping and tried very diplomatically to save me from myself, but I was 17 and you couldn't tell me anything. The designers are in for a treat.

10:03 -- Christian is already unhappy (just for a change). "I think prom is horrible and tacky and gross." I can't argue with him there. The kids get to choose their own designers, and the designers are giggling like school children.

10:05 -- Kevin is from New Jersey and has some special insight into Jersey girls and prom. It's all about tanning, and hair, and stealing liquor from your parents' liquor cabinet.

10:07 Christian's meltdown is in full flower already. "She wants so much tacky stuff, white and black, and brown, and gold, and lace. She's killing me. I'm not feeling very fiece right now." I predict a few more hissy fits in the future, most likely from Christian.

10:12 -- It's 10:12 and Ricky is crying.

10:22 -- "I'm not a dressmaker, I'm a designer!" It's not looking good for Christian. His client is not happy.

10:23 -- Now it's Tim's turn to weigh in. Rami's look is too mature. Victorya has a lot of work to do. Kevin doesn't want to hem his dress. And Christian is ready to get voted off. He's such a drama queen.

10:32 -- Quote of the night, from Ricky: "When I had a girlfriend, I actually made her prom dress. That should have been a clue right there, right?"

10:36 -- Chris stayed home and watched old movies and got drunk on his prom night. My type of guy.

10:42 -- Fashion show time! Here's my take:

• Sweet Pea -- loved it!
• Victorya -- liked it
• Chris -- loved it!
• Kevin -- hated it
• Jillian -- liked it
• Christian -- hated it
• Kit -- liked it
• Ricky -- liked it
• Rami -- liked it

10:47 -- I think Kevin might be out on this one. I hope it's not Christian, as obnoxious as he is. He does have that brand of raw talent that allows one to countenance a bit of obnoxiousness.

10:51 -- This is going to be a tough one. Nothing is really terrible. Given the feedback from the judges, now I'm thinking Ricky might be on the chopping block.

10:56 -- And the the winner is Victorya. Her look was definitely a little more edgy and conceptual than Sweet Pea's, but I thought Sweet Pea's was a better looking dress.

10:58 -- Wow, it's down to Rami and Kevin and Christian, three of the best designers on the show.

10:59 -- And I was right the first time. It's Auf Wiedersehen, Kevin. The New Jersey boy loses the New Jersey prom challenge for making a dress that was "too cheap looking." Smells like irony to me.

—lori.

January 8, 2008 — 19:59 EST

So five days after Iowa, now it's New Hampshire's turn. If I could go out on a limb for a moment, I am going to predict that Barack Obama will win the Democratic primary, and McCain will win the GOP race.

And if I may just add, I am really quite jealous of the folks in these early states. Nobody ever comes to Rochester, New York, during these national elections, yet just today both Mike Huckabee and Barack Obama were in tiny Rochester, New Hampshire, with its 31,000 citizens. If the national coverage is to be believed, you can't go out to breakfast in New Hampshire without running into three presidential candidates between the coffee and waffles. And if you have a baby as a handy political prop, even better. This doesn't seem fair.

Thank goodness for C-SPAN. Looooooove the C-SPAN. I spent most of last weekend watching C-SPAN. I saw New Hampshire events with Mike Huckabee, Mitt Romney, John McCain, and Ron Paul on the Republican side and John Edwards, Barack Obama (and Michelle Obama), Hillary Clinton (and Bill Clinton) and Bill Richardson on the Democratic side. In this format, as the candidates deliver their stump speeches and answer questions from the crowd, it's easy to see good qualities in all of them. I now understand why so many New Hampshire voters, despite the fact that they have such incredible access to the candidates, still say they haven't made up their minds yet. (In a CNN/WMUR poll taken yesterday, 27% of likely Republican primary voters and 21% of likely Democratic primary voters still had not made up their minds.)

For me, I wish I could take Joe Biden's foreign policy (even though Biden dropped out after Iowa), Bill Richardson's energy policy, John Edwards's health care policy, and Barack Obama as Secretary of State for Decency and Joy.

Oooh, Wolf Blitzer is standing in front of the big board and Mr. Goddess and I have a beer at the ready. The festivities are about to begin.

8:00 -- Polls close at 8:00 and at 8:00 and 30 seconds, CNN can project that John Edwards will come in third place. "The real battle, and it's no surprise here, is between Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama." Thanks, Wolf. No projections yet on the Republican side but give them 45 seconds and I'm sure they'll come up with something.

There are also some "real numbers," as Wolf likes to call "voters." With 10% of the precincts reporting, McCain is in the lead with 37% of the vote, Mitt Romney has 28%, and Mike Huckabee has 12% of the vote. On the Democratic side, Clinton is in the lead with 39% (this is again with only 10% of the precincts reporting), Obama is in second with 36%, and Edwards is in 17%.

8:12 -- It took them all of 12 minutes, but CNN projects that John McCain is the winner of the Republican primary in New Hampshire. "What a dramatic comeback!" says Wolf. You may sense a slightly annoyed tone to my voice when I comment on these early projections. It's because I'm an old fashioned girl, I guess. I like "real numbers." There are still only 11% of the precincts reporting in New Hampshire. I know they have all these mathematical formulas and exit poll data. But I've been burned by projections and exit polls before, baby. Twice. What's wrong with reporting the results as they come in and letting us see for ourselves how the election is going? Facts on the ground. I am a big believer of facts on the ground.

8:19 -- Speaking of facts on the ground, with 12% of the precincts reporting, Clinton is opening up her lead with 40% of the vote over Obama with 36%. That's a little surprising given all the Obama surge talk we've been hearing since Iowa.

8:42 -- With 18% of the precincts reporting, nothing has changed on the Democratic side. Interesting. The CNN pundits have spent all afternoon talking about what happens if Clinton comes in second. What if she loses by double digits? What if she manages to keep it close? Can she compete in South Carolina? Etc. etc. etc. So now what happens if Clinton manages to win? I'm sure it will be "huge," "dramatic," "amazing," "a tidal wave," "a miraculous comeback," "New Hampshire makes another Clinton the 'The Comeback Kid.'" It can be fun watching pundits create their own expectations and then get shocked, shocked when reality gets in the way.

8:48 -- There's Mitt Romney wearing what I can only describe as a nuclear blue suit. I think Mitt Romney and Guy Smiley were separated at birth. What do you think?

(In looking for that picture of Guy Smiley, I discovered I'm not alone in thinking Mitt Romney looks like Guy Smiley. Just because it's more true doesn't make it less funny.)

9:01 -- Now it's Mike Huckabee's turn to concede to McCain, and he's certainly a lot warmer and a lot less Muppet-esque than Romney.

9:24 -- The crowd at John McCain headquarters is happy. And they like their three syllable chants: "Mac is BACK! Mac is BACK!" "John Mc-CAIN! John Mc-CAIN! John McCAIN!" "Mich-i-GAN! Mich-i-GAN! Mich-i-GAN!"

9:37 -- Could it be that the Democratic primary results could all hings on -- sharp intake of breath! -- college students?! Those young voters notorious for talking a good game then flaking out when it comes time to go to the polls now seem to hold this election in their hands. With 46% of the precincts in, nothing has changed. Clinton is still in the lead with 40% of the vote with Obama still at 36%. But two key college towns have not yet reported, and the CNN pundits are all in a tizzy over whether these crazy kids will turn out. You go, guys! I know it's still winter break, but put down your iPhone and head to your polling place. You can send a Twitter post and update your Facebook page when you get back!

9:50 -- This just in from Wolf Blitzer: "We may have to actually wait and get the results the old fashioned way: waiting until the votes are counted."

There you have it, folks! We're counting votes! Consider this a victory for old fashioned girls, including -- possibly -- Hillary Clinton.

—lori.

10:46 -- Hold the phone (again). CNN can project that Hillary Clinton has won the New Hampshire primary. The Associated Press came out with their projection about five minutes earlier, and you *know* some CNN producer back in the booth is spitting nails that they were beaten to the punch.

UPDATE -- If we could return to facts on the ground for just a moment, the real purpose of this primary is to award delegates to the national nominating conventions. In that tally, despite all the fervor and excitement about the "huge" and "dramatic" results between Obama and Clinton, they both were awarded the same number of delegates: nine.

January 3, 2008 — 18:55 EST

The Iowa caucuses begin in just over an hour, and already the talking heads on CNN are creaming their pants waiting for the returns to start coming in. I'm worried.

I'm not worried about any particular result. I'm worried about the media coverage. The journalists and pundits covering this campaign haven't had anything real to talk about for more than a year. They are like racehorses trapped in the starting gate, straining for the finish line. The language is already scary: "It finally begins!" "It's a day that's been circled on political calendars for months." "It could be anyone's game and in a few hours we'll finally know who emerges as the winner in Iowa." As a result of all this pent-up media energy, a completely ridiculous system involving around 200,000 corn farmers will be blown totally out of proportion.

So just what is a caucus, anyway? The mainstream media have been doing these "So just what is a caucus, anyway?" pieces all week, but they are always done with this "aw, shucks" undertone. "Aw, those cute Iowans, meeting in each others living rooms, bringing cookies and pie and talking to their neighbors about politics. That's the stuff of democracy." The BBC America reporters covering the caucuses seem to get particularly swept away with the heady romance of good ol' fashioned USA democracy in action.

But the Iowa caucuses have a dirty little secret: hardly anyone participates. Part of the romance around the early electoral states of Iowa and New Hampshire is that the people in these small, unrepresentative states take their duty seriously and are really engaged in the process. In Iowa, turns out that's just not true. 2 million of Iowa's 3 million residents are registered to vote, and of those only 150,000 Democrats and 80,000 Republicans are expected to participate in caucuses. That's only about 12 percent of registered voters. So much for participation.

There are other issues with the Iowa caucuses that make them less the bastion of participatory democracy that they are portrayed to be.

1. The caucuses begin at 7pm sharp. If you can't be there at 7pm, you can't participate. So anyone who has to work at 7pm (oh, let's say nurses, police officers, bar and restaurant waitstaff, couples who can't get a babysitter, the babysitters of couples who could get a babysitter, etc.) are left out in the Iowa cold.
2. When you attend a Democratic caucus, you are asked to publicly choose which candidate you prefer. If your candidate does not garner 15 percent of the participants in his or her corner, you can either leave or move in to one of the other groups. It is this "neighbors persuading neighbors" bit that's always romanticized by the pundits, but what if one of the people doing the persuading is your boss? Or your minister? Or a party activist, promising you a spot at the state's convention delegation if you come over to their side?

3. Those initial counts -- when everyone first says who they support -- are not reported to anyone ever. It's therefore possible for a candidate to come in third or fourth in the preferences of participants overall without anyone ever knowing it. For example, if you attend a caucus of 60 people a candidate must get at least nine supporters to be considered "viable." So if six people support Dennis Kucinich, 27 people support Barack Obama, and 27 people support John Edwards, those six people in Kucinich's corner will be asked to support another candidate. The fact that they initially supported Kucinich is never known by anyone. Multiply that across the 1,781 precincts in Iowa, and you'll never know how many people in Iowa actually thought Dennis Kucinich would make a good Democratic presidential nominee.
4. Forgetting all that nonsense for a moment, even after the Kucinich supporters in our example above move on to support, say, Obama, those vote totals are not reported either! So if there are 60 people in that room, the result coming out of that precinct is not "Obama: 33, Edwards: 27." Those totals are plugged into a mathematical formula that no one ever explains! except to say "it's reaaaallly complicated, Wolf!" That formula decides how many state delegates each of the two candidates in our scenario will receive (not national convention delegates; those are different). Our hypothetical precinct might have only three or four delegates, and that's the only number that counts in the end of this "democratic" process.

My rule of thumb: if something requires this much explanation, it's probably not that good.

Turning back to CNN, the caucuses have begun, and if democracy can be defined as "lots of people in dungarees milling around," then I think the Republic is safe. With five percent of the precincts in on the Democratic side, Joe Biden has 2 percent (of the delegates, remember. Not the vote, because that we will never know) Barack Obama has 29 percent, Hillary Clinton has 31 percent, and John Edwards has 36 percent. For the Republican returns, with two percent of precincts reporting, John McCain has 11 percent, Fred Thompson has 17 percent, Mitt Romney has 24 percent, and Mike Huckabee is in the lead at 33 percent. "I caution you, these are early numbers. It's going to be a long night."

Indeed.

—lori.

P.S. -- hold the phone. After all the cautions and "it's still early" Wolf Blitzer has just announced that CNN has projected Mike Huckabee as the winner of the GOP Iowa caucus with only 15 percent of the precincts reporting. "Looks like Huckabee did it! A huge, huge, development in the race! Back to you, Anderson."

P.P.S. -- CNN is showing the pie chart of overall results for the GOP caucus and there is a big gray slice of the pie that's just empty, like someone ate it or something. Looking at the CNN website, 11% of that gray area belongs to Ron Paul. I smell a conspiracy theory being cooked up by the blogosphere as we speak.

Over and out -- "A dramatic development, a huge, huge, I can't even tell you how huge this is, win for Barack Obama in the Democratic caucuses." Looks like "huge" and "dramatic" are the watchwords of the night at CNN Election Central. So much for a late night. We're done as far as CNN is concerned at 9:28 pm. One more glass of wine, and it's time for bed.

January 2, 2008 — 22:00 EST

"One of you will be named the winner, and one of you will be out. Let's start the show!"

The Goddess Watches Project Runway
(so you don't have to)

10:03 -- Model picking time. This time they all get to re-pick their models. Let's see if Sweet Pea is last out of the bag again. Christian chooses Lee. Looks like everyone's fighting over Lee, but I like Kit's model Marie. She's very Audrey Hepburn.

10:04 -- Yea! for the first time ever Sweet Pea isn't last!

10:06 -- Heidi tells them they'll find out the challenge tomorrow "very early." I bet it's a vegetable market. They haven't had the crazy "make an outfit from groceries" challenge yet.

10:07 -- It's 6:00 in the morning, and Tim Gunn goes knocking on the contestants' doors. Quote of the day, from Kit: "I was a little bit traumatized because I was in my pajamas in front of Tim Gunn."

10:09 -- And they're at Hershey's! I didn't know there was a Hersheys' store in Times Square.

10:10 -- Elisa (positive force): "I was sooo excited! Yea! It's chocolate." Christian (negative force): "Great, we get to make shit out of candy."

10:11 -- The designers have five minutes to grab whatever they can get your hands on, and they proceed to run around like, well, kids in a candy story.

10:17 -- They have only one day to make an outfit out of their candy prodcuts. Jillian is the only one who is using all edible materials for her garment -- Twizzlers.

10:19 -- Christian has to unwrap over 1,000 peanut butter cups to use the wrappers for his dress. That's hilarious.

10:20 -- Wow, Elisa has a tale to tell. She was hit by a Porsche in London, where she was launching a T-shirt line. She fractured her skull, broke her neck, and was in a coma for five days. And she has a daughter named Calliope.

10:22 -- Time for Tim's critique

10:25 -- If I may make a prediction, I think Elisa is gone. They told that touching story about her and her daughter and her near death experience because they had to get it in now before they give her the Auf.

10:32 -- Christian: "Oh my god, so many things are so ugly." That little snot nose thinks he's all that.

10:39 -- Fashion show time! Here's my take:

• Ricky -- liked it
• Chris -- loved it!
• Kit -- liked it
• Elisa -- hated it
• Kevin -- liked it
• Christian -- loved it!
• Sweet Pea -- liked it
• Rami -- loved it!
• Jillian -- liked it
• Victorya -- liked it (but why is her model walking like that?)

10:54 -- The highest and lowest scores are Rami, Jillian, Elisa, Sweat Pea, Chris, and Victorya. I don't even know who is in what category on this one. There aren't any real stinkers in the bunch. As it turns out, the top three are Rami, Jillian, and Chris. On the bottom: Elisa, (where's the joy?), Victorya (getting slammed for the weird walk), and Sweet Pea (boring).

10:56 -- Damn, I though Chris had this one. But the winner is: Rami. Wow, Victorya looks so pissed to be in the bottom three. But she's in. and we're down to Elisa and Sweet Pea.

10:57 -- And Elisa is out. I know I slammed her a little bit in the first episode, but in reality she was just a nice, positive, friendly, joyful person, even in defeat. Auf Wiedershen, Elisa!

—lori.

January 1, 2008 — 17:55 EST

Happy New Year!

I'm back from celebrating Christmas in suburban Pennsylvania, and have many lovely pressies in tow, including: some stainless steel cookware, Christmas socks, a weed whacker, and many books (including two copies of the Onion's Our Dumb World atlas).

From Mr. Goddess I got a sweet new digital camera. Which brings me to my first New Years resolution: take more pictures (other resolutions include: run a 10K, remember people's birthdays, learn to play bluegrass guitar, take better care of my skin, and vote for the winner in a presidential election).

Here is the first picture taken with the new camera. That's my neice (she somehow manages to get into most photos) with Mr. Goddess.

To the manor born. I took Mr. Goddess to Pennsbury Manor, the home of Pennsylvania founder William Penn and the site of just about every other field trip I ever took in grade school.

The peacocks that roam the grounds of Pennsbury Manor were among the highlights of those field trips. Them, and the giant Sweetgum berries (otherwise known as stickerballs) that we use to throw at each other when the nuns weren't looking.

Nope, that's not me and Mr. Goddess. That's one of the many dioramas at Philadelphia's National Academy of Sciences museum. More field trip fodder.

"There are no polar bears in Philadelphia." Thanks, National Academy of Sciences.

—lori.