close up of goddess eyes

goddess of clarity: a blog about politics, culture, and serenity

Archive: April 1 - April 30, 2008

April 28, 2008 — 19:49 EDT

Ad Nauseum

A Closer Look at Some Political Ads You Didn't Want To See in the First Place

The goddess presents this occasional look at political ads you may not have seen if you don't live in a state that swings.

The ad everyone is talking about this week (and for "everyone" read "the ten dozen or so individuals who anchor network news broadcasts and the 800 or so campaign workers who send them email on a daily basis") is an ad running in North Carolina in advance of next week's Democratic primary.

The ad -- sponsored by the state Republican party -- denounces both candidates running for the Democratic nomination for governor in the state.

Not that the North Carolina GOP cares whether you even know who candidates Beth Purdue and Richard Moore are. The ad, of course, has nothing to do with North Carolina's gubernatorial race.

The cynic would say that the real motive of the state Republicans here is to scare white Southern voters with an image of an angry black man, associate that angry black man with another black man who some may have begun to find quite pleasant, and thus boost the electoral fortunes of Hillary Clinton, who some Republicans are looking forward to running against in the same way a bully looks forward to gym class.

But far be it from me to be cynical.

—lori.

April 22, 2008 — 19:49 EDT

So it's been six long weeks since the last votes were cast in the 2008 presidential campaign, and tonight it's finally Pennsylvania's turn to weigh in. As usual, I'm camped out here in The Goddess Attic Election Center, glass of riesling in hand, waiting for the polls to close in my home state. Well, my former home state, I guess I should say. But if Hillary is entitled to four home states, I don't see why I can't have two.

Unlike Hillary, I didn't spend my formative years huntin' and fishin' behind my granddaddy's cabin on Lake Winola in God's own country of Scranton. I grew up in what NPR last week christened the "lunch-bucket" suburb of Levittown. (Go to the index of any Intro to Sociology textbook and you'll find us: template for post-war suburbia.) It doesn't sound like a compliment to have a hyphenated "-bucket" applied to the town you were born and raised in, especially by those latte-sippers at NPR.

But all in all, it's been fascinating to see the national media try to wend their way through the tangled web of demographic stereotypes that is the Keystone State: from the "lunch-bucket" suburbs with their population of White Ethnic Catholic Males (or WECMs as I heard one pollster label them), to the rust-belt cities, to the rural "red state" counties that make up most of the state. Pennsylvania is an enigma. It's Philadelphia and Pittsburgh with Alabama in between. Pennsyl-tucky, if you will.

It's 8pm and the polls have closed in PA. Wolf Blitzer alerts the nation that based on their exit polling CNN can now project that this race is officially "competitive." Looks like the folks at CNN will have to wait until they start counting some actual votes (sorry, guys).

It's now 8:30 and the Best Political Team on Television is officially "annoying." Campbell Brown has taken over and she doesn't seem to be able to control her pundits. They've just spent the last eight minutes screaming over each other about which pastor has made more outrageous comments: Rev. Jeremiah Wright or John Hagee. I've never even heard of John Hagee! Just because you guys have gotten seven emails in the last hour about this "incredibly inflamatory controversy," doesn't mean I have any idea what the hell you're talking about! (For the record, John Hagee is a Texas evangelist who has endorsed John McCain and has described the Catholic Church as a cult. If someone can tell me why I should care, you get the gold star for the day. )

After a commercial break, the Best Political Team on Television is now rending their garments over the latest Bill Clinton controversy, with the former prez saying Barack Obama "played the race card" over Clinton's earlier comments after Obama's South Carolina win. Did you follow that? Me neither, but apparently this latest Bill eruption is "stealing the headlines" away from his wife on this important election day. Honestly, guys? Seriously? You need to look up from your Blackberrys every now and again and smell what America is cookin'. Anyone who is not on your mailing list has no clue what you're talking about.

At 8:45 p.m., the first numbers are coming in and with "way less than 1%" of the votes in (thanks, Wolf) Clinton is in the lead with 1,827 votes (65%) with 978 votes (35%) for Obama. Oh my god, he'll never catch up now!

It's now 9:04 p.m. and Wolf can happily project that Hillary Clinton is the winner in Pennsylvania. But for Clinton, winning is only half the battle. She could win and still lose the expectations game if she doesn't win by a whole heck of a lot—at least ten percentage points, the pundits say. If she wins by less than 10 points, the pundits say, it will show that she can't overcome the electoral math of the delegate counts and the primary and caucus state wins. If she wins by more than 10 points, the pundits say, it will show that Obama cannot close the deal and that Clinton — and the superdelegates — have a legitimate reason to believe that she can win the voters the Democrats need to win in November.

In dissecting the whys and wherefores of tonight's vote, Wolf Blitzer and Jon King have just used the term "lunch-bucket" to describe Phildelphia's suburbs three times in the last five minutes. The quote of the night goes to Mr. Goddess: "I never heard the term 'lunch-bucket' before last week. Lunchbox, yes. Lunch-bucket, no. Did you ever carry your lunch in a bucket."

That would be a no. Mork and Mindy lunchbox, yes. Lunch-bucket, no.

—lori.

UPDATE: At 11:30 pm, with over 90% of the votes in, Clinton is winning Pennsylvania by — exactly 10 points. Six weeks of campaigning, hundreds of hours and thousands of column inches of punditry and analysis and ... nothing changes again. And the wheels on the bus go round and round.


April 16, 2008 — 20:28 EDT

The Pope is in the Hiz-zouse! For the first time since 1976, a Pope is visiting the White House. Given our president's well-known penchant for slapping affectionately patronizing nicknames on staffers and world leaders alike, it got me to thinking: What nickname has President Bush assigned to Pope Benedict XVI, aka Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger?

Top Ten President Bush Nicknames for Pope Benedict

  1. Popey McPope
  2. Beanie Boy
  3. Bennie
  4. Benedict Arnold
  5. Eggs Benedict
  6. Hollandaise! (in the style of Louis Gosset Jr. in An Officer and a Gentleman)
  7. Ratzo
  8. Joey Ratz
  9. Sweet Sixteen
  10. Pope George and Ringo (the obvious successor to Pope John Paul)

—lori.

April 10, 2008 — 20:23 EDT :: permalink

Unflattering Politician Photo of the Week

(What's In a Name Edition)

Michael Nutter

That's right, I'm a nutter! That's Mayor Nutter to you, if you don't mind. Now at last the monkeys in my beard will have their voices heard!

Inspired by the Blogopatamus's recent post about the unfortunately named Ed Balls -- Britain's Secretary of State for Children, Schools, and Families (and Puppies and Cuddly Toys) -- I got to thinking about other politicians who may have had their paths to power hampered by similarly silly surnames.

I know nothing about Philadelphia's Mayor Michael Nutter, pictured above, except that he inspires both a desire for peanut butter sandwich cookies, pictured right, and great headlines (from today: "Nutter Promises Improved Subway Safety" and "Nutter Signs 5 Gun Control Laws").


Some others whose names cause one to giggle inappropriately:

—lori.

April 7, 2008 — 13:20 EDT

So how crazy have things been lately? I'll tell you how crazy. I missed the Phillies home opener last week! It completely escaped my internal radar, like some kind of seasonal stealth bomber. That does it: I'm officially getting too old for 10- and 12-hour days.

Here in Rochester, we've just had our third consecutive day of non-winter weather, so I suppose I should have picked up the heady scent of glove leather and pine tar in the air. As I type, the Phillies are taking on the Mets in New York's home opener and my MLB Audio Pass is already worth every penny of its $14.95 subscription fee.

In honor of my better-late-than-never appreciation of the start of baseball season, some baseball haiku:

Rollins at short stop
Brett Myers back on the mound
Could this be our year?
Swing and a pop fly
No runs, no hits, no one left
Better luck next time
April's still chilled air
Is the perfect medium
For a hanging curve
Hot dogs, mustard, beer
Two trips back for ice cream
An athlete at work
On the green infield
An easy double-play ball
Takes a wicked hop

—lori.

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